This is the first chance I have had in three days to sit down and write a blog. Although the washer repairman was supposed to come last Thursday, I received a call an hour before the scheduled appointment, informing me they didn’t have the part and wouldn’t be coming. I haven’t yet received a new appointment time … so of course, I still have no washer. Thursday night, I schlepped 6 loads next door to my neighbor's house and brought them home to dry in my still-functioning dryer. A highly inefficient way to do laundry ... not to mention that we live on five acres and my neighbor is not... more

One of my regular readers has been trying to incorporate an older teen boy into her home, with varying degrees of success. Recently, this courageous and giving mom posted that her “son” states, “he's having an identity crisis. Who or what does he really want to be?”

This comment falls right on the heels of a conversation I had in the car with Beth just a few days ago. I believe it was actually on her birthday, as she was turning 11 years old. She... more

In my recent blogs about Dora and her manure moving, a reader inquired how to get a teenager to work when they refused to do anything. You can’t make someone work. I wanted Amy to get a job on her own as soon as she turned 16, but of course she had no intentions of doing so. My husband and I arranged her first couple of jobs, at age 14 and 15. When she did... more

I sat Dora in my lap this morning before she headed to the bus and read her Bipette’s comments and questions about how to handle her “unofficial” teen-aged foster son. Together I talked through my thoughts with Dora … and now I’ll share them with you …

Here are the significant quotes from Bipette’s comment, addressing her foster son’s complaints that Bipette’s husband was OK but Bipette was a problem:

She was in his business too much and helping... more

Continuing with my discussion of adding troubled older children to your family, I am responding to Bipette’s comment as posted here. In my last post, I described the experience my family had when we added a 17-year-old girl we knew for many years. However, I think in some ways Bipette’s situation is a little different. This young man asked three times to... more

I’m going to interrupt my homeschooling series to address the poignant comment and many questions posted by Bipette regarding the teen boy living in her home right now. Please read the comment in its entirety here.

I’m going to start by describing a situation I experienced and how it played out in my family. I have briefly blogged about this family here.... more

It amazes me how many people assume teenagers have some inherent right to be nasty and disrespectful simply because they are teens. How often have you heard a parent dismiss and ignore disruptive and ugly behavior with the comment, “Teenagers! There’s nothing you can do with them!”

I beg to disagree. I don’t think there is any age where it is acceptable and appropriate for one person to treat another person badly, simply because they are “at that age”. Toddlers can learn appropriate ways of responding and controlling... more

One of the reader comments in response to “What would you like me to talk about?” focused on the ever-present specter of getting hotlined for “suspected abuse” and having your kids taken from you. Actually, the reader stated it more in terms of “Us” and “Them” and sadly, I couldn’t agree more with her choice of words. I would like to think this particular aspect of parenting traumatized and abused kids would be getting better—meaning... more

Late yesterday morning my husband, Beth and I hauled ourselves out of bed after only climbing in bed at 7 AM… after driving all night home from a wedding 600 miles away. We had a graduation to celebrate! We arrived at the large sports stadium downtown to watch Julie, our foreign exchange student, walk with 356 classmates to the unmistakable sounds of Pomp and Circumstance.

We had barely entered the building when suddenly Amy is standing right in front of us. She had opted to not even attend class for the past month of... more

It is pouring rain here, and we have flash flood warnings posted. I awoke to thunderstorms and several stressed dogs. Because doing anything outdoors is a wash (no pun intended) I am catching up on all kinds of indoor chores.

I sat down to blog this morning and decided to read this article posted in the comments section yesterday in response to my piece on foster care and homelessness... more