Part One Part Two

We cuddled on her bed and she wailed some more. At one point, a part of me thought she crossed over from the “really feeling pain” threshold to the “Boy do I have an audience now” threshold… but I couldn’t be sure. I really wasn’t sure… so I stopped talking, stopped trying... more

Part One

After we returned from our walk, we both prepared for bed. It was at that point Beth realized she hadn’t emptied the dishwasher yet… and she wanted to know if it could wait until morning. I replied since she was doing a poor job of remembering to do it anyway, bummer for her but she would have to do it immediately. She started slamming stuff around and stomping through the kitchen. When she completed... more

Yesterday I spent the day at the water park with Stephanie and Sean and Beth. Amy had to work… and I didn’t think missing work to play was a good plan, since she will be needing that money shortly… It was a beautiful day here, not too hot and certainly not too cool for a water park.

Beth and I spent about half the time floating on an innertube in the wave pool. She swims like a fish (actually is on a competitive swim team) and kept talking about getting off the innertube and swimming in the waves. But somehow she... more

OK, I guess all my readers’ computers must have burned up in this nationwide heatwave (it is 104 degrees here!) because I am dying for some comments to prove you are all out there… and few people are saying a word! Hmmm!! I thought my p-doc story would generate a wave of response from all you folks who have had similar experiences. Just goes to show you never know! Maybe you all have awesome p-docs?... more

I waited a day after receiving Amy’s letter before I mentioned it in this blog, even though I wanted to immediately shout to the world what she wrote. I knew better. So I mentioned it last night, sort of as an afterthought. Good thing, because tonight was… same old same old.

I took Beth to the pool for a couple of hours today. I had a ton of work to do but didn’t think it was fair to her not to have a fun summer day. And I wanted to play with her! So I sent her to ask Amy if she would like to go. I’m not sure why I was so agreeable about... more

I’m getting a pretty late start in blogging today, thanks mostly to the migraine I awoke with this morning. It probably was inevitable, since I tend to get them when I am “coming down” from a busy or stressful time (4 months of craziness qualifies) or when I miss a dose of my preventative meds (Monday night) or after chiropractic manipulation (Tuesday day) or maybe even the barometric pressure change since we received four inches of rain here yesterday. At any rate, it was a humdinger and has pretty well fried me for the day. Stephanie... more

Today on our way home from Illinois back to Kansas, we stopped at a Quik Trip for gas and a coffee break. We had Reilly, the Border collie with us on this trip, so I let her out of the back of the car and provided her with a chance to take care of her needs, too. She minds well and I rarely use a leash on her. As we go from place to place, she basically walks backward (or hops), keeping her eye on me. Every expression on her face and every movement she makes reflect happiness, intelligence and intensity. And that is not lost on the casual bystander, either. Another motorist fueling his car... more

Other than acknowledging how similar Nancy’s thoughts and feelings are to her own, Amy hasn’t said too much about what she is thinking. Her dropped defenses, real tears and willingness to “cuddle” the other day told me the DVD hit home. It was as if she knew that I knew and further pretenses at that moment seemed pointless. That is not to say those walls won’t erect again immediately, and probably have already.

I printed off Nancy’s story in an abbreviated version and handed it to Amy today. I asked (per Nancy Ashe’s suggestion) if Amy wanted to see the video again or... more

During this conversation, we were actually sitting on the couch, next to each other. Amy had real emotions on her face… the video had so blown her away she couldn’t hide her feelings. Occasionally she put her head on my shoulder and cried… really cried. And I felt maternal for a change! It makes such a huge difference to interact with someone who has even a touch of vulnerability… it really kicks the mommy mode into gear.

When I showed the video to Larry, Sean and Stephanie, I was struck by Sean’s comment at... more

After Amy and I watched the video, and after Amy acknowledged the similarities between herself and Nancy, we started to talk. OK, mostly I talked… but she actually listened. She did admit she “tuned some of it out” because it was too hard to hear. But she did hear Nancy express the thoughts and feelings Amy lives with every day.

I told Amy that thanks to Nancy’s honesty, I finally understood how unequipped Amy is to be “in relationship” with her family. I said that although she had seen anger in... more