Continuing with my “assignment” to describe my vision for ATN … I started by talking about educating the uneducated. I stated how difficult it will be for us to create appropriate, affordable and accessible resources and support if those in charge of providing those services don’t understand our lives or our family dynamics.

Here’s another aspiration for this organization … how’s about that it is financially self-supporting? My... more

Continuing on from my description of the original four moms that conceived of the organization that eventually became ATN, and from my distaste of the business of business, I’d like to see if I can put into words my vision for ATN going forward.

Since this organization sprang from my experiences and my realization that services... more

I have had an absolutely insane day. One of those days when I went from one phone line to the other, thankful that Kelly is here to answer the ATN line as I am beeping through calls on the other line.

Kelly and I spent most of the day at the Elms Resort, the location for our upcoming conference. We met another ATN staff member there, and Kelly and (the other) Nancy agreed I did OK in picking a nice place! We drove the hour back home and took pictures of the trainer riding Beth’s pony... more

Tonight’s Without a Trace episode was a repeat, but one I had not seen before. In case you haven’t watched that series before, it is about a person who disappears and the Missing Persons caseworkers who solve the disappearance.

Tonight’s disappearing person was a social worker. He “went missing” a few days before he was due to quit his job. They find him alive, and he had “disappeared” because he was helping a pregnant mom evade the authorities—other state social... more

I skimmed the recent posts this morning from one of ATN’s listserves, and several interesting things caught my eye. The first was this comment from one of the moms:

What a miserable situation to be in … that of an adoptive parent of a child with RAD and whatever else. Boy would I like to get off the wagon and start over. I just want to yell, "HELP" to someone and have all of our situations fixed. I want these kids "healed" so that they can lead... more

I had another post nearly written for tonight. But I have to switch gears. My head is spinning and I have to share this with you.

While we were in Colorado last week, I heard on Colorado news, way up in Estes Park, something about a Kansas girl that was abducted from a Target store in broad daylight last Saturday night. She had graduated from high school two weeks ago. The Target store is in a very nice part of town in this very nice community.... more

In the last several posts, I have been discussing the dynamics in our families that result in crisis situations. Some of the information has been drawn from Jodee Kulp’s book Families at Risk, and some has been from my own experiences. In this post I’d like to examine why parents are reticent to ask for help.

Sometimes, families simply don’t know how truly pathological their situation has become. In their effort to deal with... more

Continuing with my series on abuse allegations and indicators of a highly stressed foster or adoptive family, in this post I want to address how the provider’s agency or community can exacerbate or relieve these stresses. I am continuing to draw information from Jodee Kulp’s book.

Sometimes the following negative contributions from the provider’s agency or community can be the straw that breaks the camel’s... more

There is a plethora of wisdom in Jodee Kulp’s book, Families at Risk: A guide to understanding and protecting children and providers involved in out-of-home or adoptive care. In this post, I am going to share with you some of her thoughts on when it is understandable and desirable that you ask for help.

She starts off by quoting an “oldie but goodie” article published in July 1961 by Indiana University (my arch rival as a Purdue grad!) titled, Teacher’s Handling of Children... more

Continuing with my discussion of abuse allegations levied against foster and adoptive parents, I want to share with you some of the amazing wisdom found in Jodee Kulp’s excellent book, Families at Risk; A guide to understanding and protecting children and providers involved in out-of-home or adoptive care.

In the preface, Jodee sets the tone by stating:

As adults, we may want to excuse our behavior or blame the child when the real solution... more