My last post was in response to a poignant series of questions by a reader who is struggling with some very difficult kids. In her response to my post, she elaborated that she had two tough kids, making the line-of-sight supervision even harder. She says they recognize the difficulty the mom has in micromanaging two kids, stating … “They use those fleeting unsupervised seconds (and I do mean seconds) to destroy property,... more

This comment was left in response to my blog about How to regain control of an out-of-control household.

Now here's a question(s) I have on the control issue. When our youngest came as part of a sib group of four, she began by trying to control and manipulate Mom and Dad. Mom saw through her "tricks" early on, and had the upper hand nearly from the get-go. Dad was more of a softy, and although firm,... more

There are several posts in the attachment forum that all focus on one basic issue … how does a parent regain control of a household where the child already has the upper hand? In one case, a mom writes that whenever she is shopping or at a store, her child throws a tantrum. Another mom writes about how her child will do nothing she asks. And as we all know, our kids can make control battles out of breathing …

My answer to this centers on a realization I had years... more

I have been ruminating this morning about last night’s Older Child Adoption meeting. Two pre-adoptive couples were at this support group meeting; one couple who has three young bio kids are planning to add a teen girl, and the other couple is bringing home two kids under the age of 5 or 6. Looking at their excited, anticipatory faces, I couldn’t help but sit there and wonder if their idyllic image would last, or if it didn’t, how long it... more

Today was a solid advocate for attachment kind of day. I could barely drag myself out of bed, thanks to the lingering and powerful effects of the muscle relaxant I ingested last night. I spent the morning making more phone calls and networking on behalf of the conference in August.

I had a late lunch with a gentleman I connected with as a result of a phone call to Hallmark, requesting donations for the conference. Hallmark referred me... more

While all the controversy was swirling around Sandra these past few weeks, I have been spotty in my blogging and certainly not controversial. Not that I can’t be … it’s just that most of my energy has gone towards getting through the day. I’m still not 100% well. I called the doc today about my productive cough and general inability to completely shake this whatever-it-is. Hopefully I’ll be operating at full throttle here shortly—thanks for your patience!

We did manage... more

Stephanie is a waitress this summer, at the same restaurant she has worked at in Illinois and even Minnesota, where she is in college. It’s a chain, if you haven’t figured that out …

Kyle also waited tables, as did my husband (in college) and I, in high school and college. In fact, I worked at … are you ready? … Farrell’s fantastic fabulous fountain of fun! Just for jollies, I Googled it tonight, and was surprised to find it is making a comeback. I guess some old things still... more

After driving all day, we returned Thursday evening from Colorado. It was 34 degrees, windy and very winter-like when we left in the morning. It was 88 degrees driving across the prairie.

I just had to share these chipmunk pictures with you. This is a tradition in my family. Perhaps it would be more accurate to say this is a tradition for me … I have loved photography for years and I always take the kids to ride a tram to the top of this mountain in Estes and feed the chipmunks. If you go in July, the critters are so fat... more

In the series of posts I just completed, I discussed our purpose in parenting our challenging children, and how we should best measure our success. Being satisfied that the gift is in the giving is a very, very difficult concept to absorb, but it really is true. It is an easy concept when one thinks about more accepted areas of giving, like Christmas or birthdays. As children mature into adults, most of them learn that the true joy of Christmas or other... more

Julie, our foreign exchange student, returns to China in a little less than a week. She has been accepted to a university here in the US and plans to return to start college here this fall. We are glad that we will be able to keep in touch.

She arrived home early today because school is almost over for her. We just had lunch together, and I found myself explaining “conditioned responses” to her. She had asked me if Amy has a better relationship with my husband than she does with me. I responded that Amy had fewer conditioned... more