Well, the fur is a’flyin’ over on the community board I anonymously mentioned a couple of days ago. I have been blasted for all manner of things:

• Most notably, they are angry that I “cross-posted.” But I didn’t … I did describe a scenario I read about on that board, but I mentioned no names, did not quote the post, and did not name or link the board. Based on their logic, anything anybody reads on that board can never be used in... more

Today is Beth’s birthday. She's 11 years old. She’s upstairs doing a little schoolwork today, and then we are off to get our nails done. After that it’s lunch at Panera (she likes soup in a bread bowl) and then we will come home and feed the dogs and put a loaf of bread in the bread machine to go with the Crock Pot Beef we’re having for dinner, at her request. What she doesn’t know is that we will then go see Martian Child before I drop her off at the Parks and Recreation Home Alone class at 4 PM. We’ll all celebrate... more

Today was another exciting day for young Dora. After missing the bus yesterday, she was determined not to repeat that mistake today. However, either her haste or her anger worked against her this morning. She did a lousy job on her morning chores, and left her glasses at home today. I think the latter was most likely premeditated, as this is by no means the first time those glasses have not been doing her any good.

I didn’t notice the missing glasses when she left this morning (I think I was supposed to!) but I did notice as she disembarked the bus. I... more

I used to be an active participant in ATN’s list serves—heck, I used to benefit as much or more than I contributed. I needed the outlet when I was still in the thick of parenting Amy … Currently, I am not reading our lists regularly, although I do check in as often as I can. I simply can’t keep up with the exploding number of new members, new lists, and new crises.

I also occasionally visit another community forum, although I have essentially backed out of that one as well. But upon... more

My life these days seems to be a relative state of tired. Am I totally exhausted, partially exhausted, or just in my usual coma? Tonight I am totally exhausted, approaching comatose. I think a Calgon experience is in my future tonight. Tomorrow I have my massage scheduled. It was supposed to coincide with a Parks and Recreation class for Beth, but that class was canceled due to not enough kids. I’m not sure what I will do with Beth …

Good thing it wasn’t today or I would... more

I know that many of you who read this blog read Julie’s blog as well. If you do, you know that Julie’s daughter, Lulu, was hospitalized again a couple of days ago. This recent development occurred after Lulu’s escalation, where she once again threatened to hurt herself or others.

As Julie was describing the scene to me yesterday, she mentioned KayKay’s reaction … Without sharing details that are not... more

One of my biggest complaints about “the system” as it stands now is that parents are woefully unprepared for the reality of integrating attachment and trauma-affected kids, and then those same parents are further tethered in their ability to parent by a society that shuns anything remotely “outside the box” in terms of parenting freedoms.

This series of pictures recently crossed my desk. I cannot credit it to one particular source … it is one of those emails that is forwarded from one person to the next at random. I just had to share it with you, though, as few parents... more

Recently, a reader who is struggling with the difficulties of reaching out to a troubled teen boy had these questions on her mind:

When and how do you decide they aren't going to change? When do you give up? How do you measure progress?

Do I keep trying as long as he doesn't leave our home and assume that if he stays he's wanting to work on it?

How do you know that a child is like Cindy or Kathy and just won't ever choose to give... more

Dora’s therapy session on Friday went well. It is a great relief for me to have someone else directing the conversation and probing into feelings, allowing me to just be the mom cuddling the kid in question. Dora was cooperative, reflective, and appropriate.

Early on in the session, the therapist asked Dora if she knew about “the different kinds of parents”. The therapist explained about “birthparents”, “legal parents” and “parenting parents.” This was a good lesson for Dora, because currently three different people or couples represent those three types... more

I have a houseful of people this weekend. Stephanie is home for the first time since she traveled with us to meet Dora two months ago. Steph is accompanied by her boyfriend, Sean. Kyle and Marie are home as well. We are celebrating Beth’s 11th birthday a few days early.

I have been cooking for several days straight: two batches of Oreo Ice Cream dessert, homemade Chex snack mix (Kyle loves it hot from the oven), homemade trail mix, corn casserole, potato casserole, two large loaves of homemade sourdough bread, angel food cake dessert, Jello salad; ham and egg... more