I had a great discussion this morning with Pat Johnston of Perspectives Press. I have known Pat for twenty years or more and I very much value her friendship and her wisdom. We talked about many things, and I will be processing our conversation for several days. But there was one thing in particular she told me that I want to share.


We were talking about ATN, my reasons for starting it and where I want it to go. We talked about the perception other people have about ATN and about me as an individual. Pat has had similar experiences in being integrally involved in an organization because she was very active in RESOLVE. She is an adoption and infertility publisher. She is knowledgeable and passionate about serving her constituency. She understands me and my motivations.


So it was with much wisdom and compassion for me that she shared the things she has learned about how to accomplish what she wants to accomplish while not mowing down the folks in front of her in the process! She told me how she realized she knows so much, has so much passion, and has been “in the field” for so long, that she forgot what the "newbies" knew (and didn't know.) She realized her writing had nuances “between the lines” that the been-there, done-that folks completely picked up on, but the folks new to the topic missed entirely.


The critical part of that is, of course, that if newbies don’t understand what is behind what I write, I run the risk of sending the entirely wrong message and scaring someone away from getting the help that I so much want to provide. Ouch, that is not what I want to do.


Busted! I know I tend to write this blog for those of you already in the trenches. I write what I needed to hear, what I needed validation about, what I needed explanations for when I was where you are. I much prefer to write the more conversational blogs because I know how much you need someone to echo what you are thinking but are afraid to say or can’t even figure out. But I certainly don’t intend to leave the newbies out.


I write about and talk about what I know to be true in the general population of folks parenting kids like we are parenting. And that is what Pat discussed … She, too, realized her experiences were not so unique and she was speaking for many people when she wrote and spoke about infertility issues. And that combined passion is powerful and very motivating. We know how we felt about our experiences, so the opportunity to speak for lots of folks just deepens our passion.


For folks new to RAD, new to the realities of this parenting, I am sorry if I blow you away! I forget what I didn’t know! Please don’t hesitate to ask me questions or ask for clarification of my ideas or thoughts. You can always email me personally at nancy@radzebra.org.


And thanks, Pat, for being such a great and intuitive friend.


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