This series could go on forever as I respond to reader’s comments, and perhaps even more significantly, because I suspect it will take me forever to personally process this whole “relationship” with Amy.


One reader wanted to know why I thought so many people want to deny that adoptees have some tough issues to face. I think there are several reasons for that…


First and foremost, I think a significant number of people in general go to great lengths to avoid facing tough issues. I have no idea what the percentage might be, but I’d hazard a guess that it might even be a majority? So many of the parents I have met on this journey have been forced to address tough issues… but they didn’t necessarily set out to do so. And the ones who seem to be the most successful at surviving this journey are those who can face pain, loss, grief, resentment, and other negative emotions head-on.


My friend Julie was telling me about a Bible study she attended about a month ago. The topic was essentially what I just said most people avoid—facing your pain. Julie commented how it was pretty much a no-brainer for her, but she could see how many other people in the study were shocked into silence. They had no idea how to respond to the challenges presented.


My daughter Beth joined us after her first adoptive placement disrupted. I’m not sure her first adoptive family would have been as comfortable facing Beth’s issues as I am. I know they wanted to help her in every way they could…but they didn’t know how and weren’t emotionally equipped to address it. Beth is at the opposite end of the emotional spectrum from Amy. As unwilling as Amy is to face her emotions, Beth lays them all out on the table and wants me to plow through them with her. I’m quite comfortable doing so.


More thoughts on this coming...


This photo was taken at Six Flags amusement park... doesn't look like she's having much fun, does it?