Recently in the Attachment Forum there was a discussion about attachment issues in adults. The person posting was struggling to determine if her difficulties in life were related to her status as an adoptee, and the breaks in her attachments when she was a very young child. She was (rightfully) complaining about how little information and few resources are available to adults trying to assess their own attachment issues.

Adoption.com has an article about adult attachment and a terrific article by Editor Nancy Ashe describing her life as an attachment-affected adult. Nancy Ashe’s keynote speech at the Attachment Disorder Network’s first national conference was a show-stopper as she provided more detail about her life as outlined in the aforementioned article. (Available on DVD here.)


Although I am sure some attachment therapists work with adults, I only know of one facility that actively promotes their adult program. The Institute for Attachment in Colorado has information about their adult program on their website.


Through the years as I have spent so much time in the world of attachment, I have periodically encountered adults looking for answers. I spoke at an Adoption Congress conference last year and found myself in a different mix of the triad than “normal”. Usually I attend, present or exhibit at conferences that tend to draw adoptive parents; the Adoption Congress conference was primarily attended by birthparents and adoptees. But you should have seen those adoptees flock to the ADN table. It was unreal! They would read our large banners that flanked our exhibit table and proclaim, “That’s me! Yup, that’s ME!”


As a result of that eye-opening experience, I returned home and immediately created a listserve for those still-struggling adults. We named it “Big Zebras” and I invited a half dozen folks I met at the conference. A few joined, but the list has not been very active.


I recently added the poster from the attachment forum and I am happy to report a very interesting dialog has begun. I learn a great deal from the exchange as I struggle to understand the children we serve. But I am so grateful the Internet has provided such an amazing way to share information and ideas.


If you know of any adults struggling with attachment issues, send them my way.