Part One
Part Two
Part Three

Midway through my story, the pastor asked me directly… “What part does God play in all of this?” I have had that question posed to me quite frequently of late…


I spoke with a struggling mom last week who is parenting an elementary-aged boy. By all accounts, he sounds much like Amy did at that age. Mom and her husband are really struggling with their feelings towards this boy (or lack of feelings…) and with how those neutral or negative feelings line up with their faith and their belief that God intended for them to parent this child. So what did I do? Among other things, I read the passage from Deb Hannah’s book about Simon carrying Christ’s cross to Golgotha… I blogged about it here.


I shared the same passage with the pastor yesterday, and as I mentioned previously, I left her one of Deb’s books to read. I explained to the pastor that I believe God never promised us a rosy path. And I have often told people that while I wouldn’t wish my past 18 years on anyone, I wouldn’t want to be who I was 18 years ago, either. I wouldn’t want to be one of those folks I hear talking in the Narthex at church, and stressing over what kind of shingles are on their roof.


People often ask me why and how we dared to adopt again (Beth’s adoption) when we had been so unsuccessful with Tommy and Amy? It is a very legitimate question. While half of my family was very uncertain about the wisdom of adopting Beth, half of us (me included) never doubted for a minute that we should move forward and do it. I prayed about it, I felt peace about it, and I am, at heart, an optimistic person. And look at how God rewarded me! In my wildest imagination, I can’t conceive of a better reward than the gift of this amazing daughter.


I don’t know what God’s plan is for all of you struggling. I only know that through your pain and suffering, you will persevere and hopefully become stronger. I struggled for a very long time, and now I am reaping the rewards. The Bible is full of stories like Joseph, sold into slavery, who survives his traumatic times and ultimately accomplishes many great things.


I have managed to convince Deb Hannah to speak at ADN’s conference this year. She will talk about this very subject. How does God fit into this endless struggle to reach such damaged kids? I can’t wait to hear from her.

Photo courtesy of Church of the Resurrection