Continuing with my “assignment” to describe my vision for ATN … I started by talking about educating the uneducated. I stated how difficult it will be for us to create appropriate, affordable and accessible resources and support if those in charge of providing those services don’t understand our lives or our family dynamics.


Here’s another aspiration for this organization … how’s about that it is financially self-supporting? My husband and I have had numerous conversations about the fact that salary is not a good indicator of job satisfaction. I’m sure that is very true … I started ATN because it needed to be started and not because I had great aspirations of a high-paying job. But I’ll admit that after over a decade, I am thinking more and more about how nice it would be to at least be receiving enough salary to pay the cleaning ladies I just hired because I haven’t got a moment to clean. If I do have a moment to myself, I’m sure as heck not going to spend it dusting.


Beth is ten years old, and I can’t recapture the time I am losing sitting at the computer or helping other folks with their kids. Don’t get me wrong, I love what ATN has accomplished thus far and I am more convinced than ever at the need for what we provide. And we are regularly adding awesome volunteers. I learned today that one of those volunteers wants us to give her more to do … and I’d like to … but the very act of managing volunteers takes time.


So part of my vision for ATN includes finding enough regular, predictable funding, especially in terms of a donor base, that some of the staff working full time on behalf of this organization can actually get some remuneration for their efforts. I would like the folks who are helped by ATN to start giving back to ATN, at least in terms of becoming members. I realize we serve a population of folks who have spent unfathomable amounts of money on their kids ... but still. A membership is not much money, and it makes the statement that you are "with us." With a growing membership base we can have a louder voice and educate the uneducated more effectively. Most folks I have helped along the way have been very grateful, but I have been burned more than I care to admit. I re-homed a boy and kept him for three months and his folks promised to make a donation to ATN, but never did. I fed and housed an entire family for several days and fielded literally dozens of calls from them for several days after that and they donated nothing to the organization. Folks call me at all hours and I do what I can to help but they don't seem interested in acquiring a membership. I am getting tired of providing something for nothing (and learning the hard way to establish better boundaries) but if we are going to survive and flourish, the beneficiaries of our services need to put some money in their outstretched hands ...


And along those lines, what I really would like is to be able to start grooming someone to take over the Executive Director position in a few years so I can play with my kid, rediscover my hobbies, and write a book or two ... all the while knowing ATN would continue to grow and provide the necessary services to families so desperately in need.


I first declared my intention to be a veterinarian when I was five years old. I never gave up on that dream—never even wavered—until the end of my junior year in vet school. I hit the wall, and it wasn’t pretty. I had watched many of my other classmates hit the wall, so I knew it wasn’t just me. But all of the sudden my get-up-and-go got-up-and-went. I had one more long, hard year and for the first time, I was sick and tired of it. It was a very difficult time for me. I am very goal oriented and have no problem working hard for something I want badly enough. But working hard when I have lost my drive is very difficult.


I am not there yet with ATN, but I sense it is coming eventually. I don’t want to burn out and I don’t want to lose the momentum we have started. Whenever I get really resentful or frustrated, I get some positive feedback or God sends me a mom that clearly epitomizes the reasons for what I am doing. I believe wholeheartedly in what we are doing and I don’t want to stop this train--but I am realizing that there are some days I want off the train.


So a huge part of my vision involves doing exactly what my business-minded partners are trying to do … develop the infrastructure and donor base and supports necessary to make ATN a strong, secure organization with paid staff.


I hope this didn’t sound too whiny … I am all about telling you what I am thinking and feeling, on all subjects, and this is just where I happen to be right now. I'm sure it will pass, but sometimes I admit I am worried that it won't ...

Preventing volunteer burnout

How can we avoid burnout?


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