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I have connected with both Stephanie and Kyle today, sending text messages, emails and phone calls telling them I love them. I am still trying to wrap my mind around what happened at Virginia Tech yesterday. And the sad thing is, I get it more than most people. Sadly, I understand how warped some people can be. And I really understand how “normal” truly disturbed people can appear to folks who don’t grasp the depth of the person’s pathology. One of the dorm mates of the Virginia Tech shooter stated: “He did not seem like a guy that’s capable of anything like this.” (reference)
It is still obviously very early in this story, and little is known about the gunman, Cho Seung-Hui. However, this story reveals some interesting facts. Apparently his creative writing in his English class revealed some disturbing thoughts—enough that his teacher labeled him as “troubled” and suggested counseling. A rambling note he left about the shootings stated “You caused me to do this.” What does that say about his ability to grasp his role and his responsibilities in the midst of other human beings? He never talked to anyone, and was known as “the question mark kid” by some of the other students because when asked to sign his name on the first day of class, he simply put a question mark. When the professor asked if his name was “question mark”, Cho didn’t answer.
According to the Chicago Tribune, he had set a fire in his dorm room and stalked women. He spent much of his free time playing basketball and wouldn’t respond if someone greeted him.
Obviously, this is armchair forensics. But still, I just don’t believe this young man’s pathology is of recent origin. As I stated in my previous post, I believe this kind of hate and rage in all probability comes from a very deep core of anger and loss. Perhaps we will learn what caused this to fester; perhaps we will not.
I am so saddened by this, as we all are. As a parent, I can’t comprehend this loss. All I want to do is hug my kids. My heart goes out to all those kids whose innocence is forever changed; all those parents and family members whose lives are forever altered; all those victims whose flames are forever extinguished.
My son said (8) said “It’s OK Mom, they’re in heaven with God, they’re happy…you don’t have to cry.” I told him I was crying for so many other people who were left behind.
God bless them all.
I find it interesting that you’ve failed to contact/connect to Amy the way you have with your other children during this time of mourning. Why is that?